Anger is actually a healthy, normal emotion if you know how to express it adequately. Anger management is about learning how to identify signs that you are getting angry, and trying to deal with the situation in a positive manner. In short, it’s about learning how to manage anger. It does not try to encourage you to suppress anger or prevent you from experiencing it.
Everyone experiences anger every now and then. You may experience anger when a co-worker does not want to work together amicably, when someone cuts you off in traffic, or when a friend instigates conflict. In such and many other situations, the temptation to resort to anger is quite compelling.
Increased, irrepressible anger can eventually harm your physical and emotional health. So, you should accept its presence and learn how to deal with it.
5 Ways to Learn How to Deal with Anger:
– Forgive and forget
Letting negative feelings and thoughts, like anger, disrupt and distort your daily life can result in anger, pessimism, and bitterness.
In case you are able to forgive someone that made you angry, you will both learn an important lesson. Namely, for that person, your tolerance might be enough to remind them of the significance of remaining true to their word. For you, the ability to forgive can reemphasize the truth that no one can determine your state of mind.
If they often betray your sense of compassion, you should reconsider your relationship. Depending on the nature of the offense and the frequency of mistrust, trying to forgive rather than forget can be a great solution.
– Enhance your listening skills
If you are an active listener, you will enhance the communication between that person and you. It can build trust, which may help mitigate negative emotions and thoughts.
Improving your listening skills and demonstrating to the other person that you are really listening to them suggests that you care and that their emotions and thoughts are important to you. It can also reinforce or establish feelings of empathy. Sometimes, someone who is all worked up just wants to be understood.
– Try to resolve the problem, instead of focusing on what made you angry
Instead of focusing on what made you angry, try to resolve the problem. Is your family member or friend doing something that makes you upset? First, calm down and then try to have a constructive conversation. Is the erratic behavior of your kid making you angry? If so, try to find something that’ll keep your kid occupied.
It is important to understand that suppressed anger does not resolve anything. It can actually lead to depression and anxiety. So, you should maintain some self-discipline, breathe deeply, and find a rational solution.
– Replace negative thoughts with positive ones
Angry people are likely to act erratically, swear, or curse, when they are confronted with a stressor. This behavior can fuel bitter notions as well as render impossible any potential solution.
However, cognitive restructuring is about learning how to change the way you think. For instance, you are waiting in a queue at your favorite coffee spot when someone facing the cashier says that their order is messed up. Comprehending that resolving this issue will take time, you begin to think that “I will be late,” or “It sucks.” But, you should recognize the situation as well as rationally replace these thoughts with something like “I will stay calm, and they will resolve the issue,” “It is out of my control,” and so on.
When you try to rationalize such thoughts, you actually invite contentment and peace, rather than anger or any other negative thoughts.
– Try to relax
Relaxation techniques like relaxing imagery and deep breathing can help calm down the feelings of anger:
– Practice tai-chi, yoga, or meditation, because they can help promote relaxation and relax your muscles.
– Visualize something that does provoke relaxation – either from imagination or experience.
– Try to breathe deeply from your diaphragm, because “chest breathing” doesn’t promote relaxation.
– Repeat reassuring words, like “Take it easy,” or “Relax,” since it is also useful. You should also breathe deeply, while practicing this exercise.